what the world wants to see...

What the world wants to see are beautiful images. Paintings of ravishing beauty like the famous Mona Lisa. Photographs of scantily clad ladies with hourglass figures. Drawings of beautiful people nude. Botero has many sculptures and drawings painstakingly created from his artistic hands and mind, yet, why does his work not gain as much media and public attention? Simply because his work does not represent conventional beauty.

I received some very depressing short messages on my mobile from a very dear female friend of mine out of the blue on Monday night. She had been trying on some of her old clothes and realised that she could not fit into them any longer. She was extremely upset by it. To make things worse, her boyfriend of 3 years had been teasing her about it, making remarks at how a passing female looks so attractive with her taut body. My friend hated her current body and how she no longer looks as attractive as before. The poor girl...

I must say, she's not even as big as I am. My waist is at least 2 inches thicker than hers, and I wear one size bigger than her. Well, without a doubt, her words brought me down as well. Yet, to her, everyone is okay being "fat", except for herself. Very true indeed. The world only revolves around ourselves when it comes to looking good.

She even wanted to stop her medication because it caused water retention and bloating, which made her feel, and look, worse than ever. She had tried starving herself, and even exercising, but to no avail. She remained the same. I understood her sentiments completely as I myself suffer from a permanent bad bout of water retention and stomach bloating due to my gastric condition. Any slightest bit of food I take causes unwanted reactions in my stomach and results in a pregnant looking middle. I must admit that I hate that so much that for a long period of time, I would refuse to take any food at all so as to stay looking slim. Without saying, this worsened my gastric condition to extreme situations. I didn't care. I just wanted to look pretty.

So why is there so much emphasis on women looking svelte when men can cultivate the size of their beer bellies to gargantuan proportions? For one simple reason: Men are judged by their wallets while women are judged by their looks. Very superficial, you say? Well, look around you and tell me that is not true.

In recent years, there has been more and more attention being devoted to women's outlooks. All sorts of slimming aids, devices and services sprung up all over the world in a quest for feminine perfection. This saddens me so. The case of Slim10 causing local actress Andrea De Cruz to go through liver failure resulted in a big hoohah all over the country. Yet, did that scare women off trying to lose their "fats"? Hardly. Every month, we see new products on the shelves of pharmacies and department stores. Xando, Tummitrim, ExTrim, just to name a few.

What is the world coming to? Is a woman not attractive anymore if she has a tad more fat on her body?

This global phenomenon has brought me down to my knees. Despite my hubby's repetitive assurances of me looking hot and sexy, I still feel FAT. F-A-T. This is now the worst "F" word in any woman's dictionary. I want to slim down. I want my tummy to be flat. I want bigger breasts. Looking back 5 years ago, I thought I was perfect. That confidence that I gave myself proved alluring to men and led to many suitors who wanted to be seen with me. But came the society's nudging towards the conventional beauty of "slim".

Local artistes like Fann Wong, Jeannette Aw and Joanne Peh are all deemed as beautiful and with good figures. But why do I only see them as skinny? They have barely any breasts, no muscles anywhere and a flat bottom. What happened to the good old Marilyn Monroe curvy figure that used to make men drool? What has happened to the men's good taste?

It's the society and the media I tell you. After repeatedly telling you that Fann Wong's figure is perfect, and introducing new talents with figures similar to one another, everyone starts to think "skinny is beautiful". This is media trickery. Do not follow it blindly. If you think Jennifer Lopez looks hot. Say it out loud. There are girls like J Lo who think they're fat. And unabashedly admitting, I am one of them.

I have beautiful pert boobs, a nice round pert ass and curves in the right places. But why are there no men picking me up in clubs anymore? You have all been psycho-ed by the media. A woman should have all the assets that a woman should have. Breasts, butt and an hourglass figure. Skinny is not beautiful. It is a sign of malnutrition and inactivity of the body.

Beauty should come from within. From the confidence that one exudes. From the intelligence that one has. That is why Pamela Anderson only wins the desperate old men as her fans. She has barely any intelligence. And unless a man only wishes to bed their beatiful female and not have them as a life partner, it is quite fine to marry a bimbo. He'll probably only want to hear moaning and nothing else anyway.

No doubt every female should try to look their best, but they should NEVER resort to self-torturing methods to achieve that unfair stereotypical standard of "beauty". Everyone is born different. Some have hips, some don't. Some have boobs, some don't. Don't give in to society's desires. I know it is hard if you haven't been dated by men for ages, which just makes you want to fit in. But look at it this way, if a man won't date you because he thinks you're fat, he's shallow. And who would want to blend into a sea of bamboo-looking females? Like what I always tell my friends, in a crowd, you can always spot me. Simply because I am different.